There are a variety of models in many roles in life. Parenting is also in the literature: There are authoritarian, democratic, permissive, disinterested parenting models. Many of these combine with what parents see and model from their own parents, see from the environment, and parenting in their own ideals, resulting in a unique parental model. In fact, although there are models, the cognitive areas, social emotional aspects and interests of each child are strong and the parenting model is also different and unique. When environmental and educational factors come into play, a unique parent model emerges in itself.
“Every parent wants to create opportunities for their children that are at their best and maybe even beyond their own experiences,” says BÜMED MEÇ Schools Moda Campus School Principal Mr. Aslı Çelik Karabıyık. Of course, healthy growth conditions and educational opportunities have a great effect on the healthy development of the child, but at least as important is the relationship with the parents of the children and based on unconditional love. it will be more correct, ”he continues.
Let's evaluate together the definition of 'friend-parenting', which is frequently mentioned today, which includes features from modern, democratic and permissive parenting models. First, let's consider the basic responsibilities of a parent; unconditional love, trust, order, healthy living and development conditions… So what concepts are included in the definition of a friend? Love, sharing, interest and approval.
It is important to conduct a needs analysis with our children when setting limits.
If a parent does not teach the order and boundaries to the child and expects the child to discover, as a result, an unhappy child who is excluded from the environment and fails in the negativity he encounters may be encountered. Like every individual, children also worry about disorder and uncertainty, even if they cannot make sense of them in this way. Our friends don't set limits on us, so it shouldn't be surprising to find a child whose parents behave like friends in this sense, who are angry with them when they set limits. Of course, how we do makes the difference, not what we do as it is in every matter. While drawing the boundaries, determining the needs with our children, getting their opinions, being democratic but decisive will lead us to a healthy relationship.
According to Mr. Aslı Çelik Karabıyık, “The two different roles also have common features; interest and love ”Since the interests and strengths of each child will be different, it may be a good start to try to get to know the temperament of our child and accompany the games he / she enjoys in order to create a good relationship with our child. Every kid likes to play. The game is a tool that reveals our imagination, we can get excited and socialize many times.
New discoveries excite children as well as individuals
In addition to these, making new discoveries excites every individual, especially children. Many studies show that memories children cannot forget are often real-life experiences with their parents. A trip with them, a camp, a meal, planting herbs, taking care of them allows us to have fun together and to accumulate unforgettable memories.
From all this, we can see that friendship and parenting are actually two different roles that may have common characteristics but are also distinct in different characteristics. Just as grandmother, teacher and friend are different roles, when we mix roles in parenting, a dangerous and unstable relationship may be waiting for us. While determining our parenting model, without forgetting our role as a guide for our child, designing experiences to collect good memories will help us create a healthy and loving relationship with our child.