From Istanbul Okan University Hospital, Department of Psychology, Dr. cln. Ps. Müge Leblebicioğlu Arslan made statements about the exam process for parents and students. Leblebicioğlu Arslan said, “During this period, family attitudes that focus on the child's academic performance in a rigid and oppressive way, have difficulty in regulating their emotions, show a high stress reaction, and ignore the child's emotional process have a negative impact on the child's exam process.
Arslan said, “Your child, who has been tired throughout the year, has come to this day within his own potential. Expecting big changes in your child's academic performance a few weeks before the exam will be unrealistic, on the contrary, it will have a devastating effect on the child. In this process, I can say that the performance of the parents rather than the child will have a decisive effect on both the academic performance and the psychological well-being of the child.”
He said that it will support both academic performance and psychological well-being during the exam process for parents and students:
“For parents, take a supportive and motivating role, away from judgmental language: Appreciate your child's effort, not numerical values. Verbally and behaviorally show that you believe and trust him. Encourage him with positive and realistic approaches. Emphasize the positive aspects. Create realistic expectations away from pressure: Make sure that the communication you establish with your child throughout this process does not create high expectations for him. Otherwise, the conversations you make with the aim of creating a positive effect will make your child feel pressured and cause an increase in the level of anxiety. For example, 'We are very confident that you can already do it.' A speech that you can make in the form of 'My family will be disappointed if I don't make it.' may result in the formation of a thought. This thought can also increase the level of anxiety in the child.”
Stating that children should be reminded that the exam is only a part, Arslan said, “Explain that the exam is not the only determinant of their lives and is only a small part. Make him feel that this assessment is not an assessment of his identity, but an assessment of that exam. Emotions are contagious. Help reduce bidirectional stress: If the parent is stressed and has difficulty in managing stress, it will be more difficult for the child to manage this process. So first take action as a parent to practice skills to reduce your own stress levels. Get professional support when you have difficulties. You can also help your child learn coping techniques such as breathing exercises, relaxation exercises, and meditation. Make room for your child to do pleasant activities during the exam week: Making room for pleasure areas as well as techniques to reduce physical and mental fatigue will help the child relax mentally and reduce the stress level. said.
Emphasizing that regular and balanced routines should be established, Arslan said, “Support your child in healthy eating, exercise and regular sleep. Let your loved ones accept congratulatory and successful speeches to your child: let your child choose whether to accept congratulatory calls or visits to your child before and after the test. Conversations made in good faith can put pressure on your child. In this process, depending on your child's wishes, you can undertake the congratulations and indicate that you will convey it to him. Be careful to use emotion-oriented language instead of result-oriented language: Focus on your child's feelings and observe their emotional needs before and after the exam, rather than the scores obtained during the exam week. For example, 'How are you?' or 'How are you feeling?' Help her express her feelings by asking questions such as: he said.
Mentioning that the child's emotional expressions should be listened to, Arslan said, “Be in touch about the exam process. Let him express his feelings. Answer their questions and try to put them at ease. Support your child to get support from a specialist when you deem it necessary. Each child may have different needs in this process. For this reason, I can say that it is very important to approach your child's individual needs. In general, displaying a positive, supportive and understanding attitude during this process will help your child maintain their psychological well-being during the exam process.” he said.
Mentioning that the exam process can be a stressful process for students, Arslan continued as follows:
“For students, the exam process can be a stressful one. It is quite natural to feel emotions such as excitement and anxiety in this process. Remind yourself that it's natural to feel these emotions on a certain level. As the exam approaches, share your thoughts and feelings with your close ones, such as 'my family will be disappointed if I don't win'. Sharing rather than suppressing emotions will help you relax. Use techniques to relax the mind. Mental relaxation is very important before the exam. Meditation, breathing exercises and relaxation techniques will help reduce your stress level and increase your focus.”
Emphasizing the need to pay attention to regular sleep and balanced nutrition, Arslan said, “Studies show that lack of sleep and nutrition has an increasing effect on stress. Therefore, sleep and diet will support your mental and physical health. Be physically active. Exercising instead of just studying, going for a walk or doing activities you enjoy with your friends in a way that will not tire you out will support your psychological health. Focus on the process, not the outcome. You don't know what the result will be. The moment you can control and know is how you spend the moment you are in. Remember that the exam you will take is not the result of what kind of person you are, it is only an evaluation of the exam you took. Do not hesitate to let your family know that you want support in situations where you think you cannot cope.” said.