Although it is the responsibility of children to do homework, sometimes parents can have a very difficult time because of homework. One of the experts at DoktorTakvimi.com, Psk. From. Sıla Salantur shares tips on helping children gain responsibility for homework.
Many parents are tired of telling their children to "Do your homework" and want their children to do this without telling them. However, the responsibility of giving the child the responsibility of doing homework again falls on the parents. Psychological Counselor Sıla Salantur, one of the experts at DoktorTakvimi.com, says that the key to unlocking the responsibility of doing homework is the relationship bridge established between the child and the parent. Reminding that if there is no bond between the parent and the child, no discipline method will work. From. Salantur underlines that in order to establish this bond, it is necessary to increase the number of moments spent with the child with great care that does not contain advice, warning, comparison or insult. Ps. From. Salantur said, “What makes you laugh the most with your child? If you are playing, how much of this time can you stay in the moment with your child? How often do you think of sentences such as “Even though this game is over, I will watch my favorite TV series... Let me send this e-mail when the game is over... I will prepare dinner for tomorrow even if I sleep”? If your answer is “Yes, very often”, then it is almost impossible for you to overcome the difficulty you have with your child about homework. If there are parents who constantly remind them of what they need to do in the eyes of children and punish them by pointing fingers when they do not do what is expected, the only thing that children learn is that they are loved conditionally by their parents. That's why you need to establish this connection first."
Have a meeting with your child and make a decision
Mentioning the importance of discipline as well as bonding in order to give the child the responsibility of doing homework, Psk. From. Salantur continues his words as follows: “To have a joint decision meeting with our child on this issue and to consider our child's decisions at this stage where boundaries are set are among the positive discipline methods. “Come on!” What do you need to do without having to say? Is there any activity you would like to do together with us before homework? Starting from which course homework will help increase your intrinsic motivation?” You should make concrete and applicable decisions regarding the action of doing homework with questions such as questions. Then ask, “Is this decision right for you? Is there anything you want to change?” and reconsidering the decision in case we feel dissatisfied can help you achieve effective results.”
Being a parent means the continuation of our childhood
Stating that it is not a coincidence that we observe similar patterns in our relationship with our parents on homework, in our relationship with our own child, Psk, one of the experts at DoktorTakvimi.com. From. Sıla Salantur said, “Being a parent is the continuation of our childhood. We also have beliefs that we acquired in our childhood. Some of them can be positive while others can be negative. Like “I am worthless, inadequate”… Well, what belief about myself feeds my child's failure to do homework and why might I feel a great discomfort? Could it be that he's telling me I'm inadequate? Could my discomfort with my child's homework be related to my own past? In fact, being a parent opens many curtains in order to increase our contact with ourselves. What we have to do is to realize and transform what is going on behind the curtain.”
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